by Jasmine | Sep 10, 2013 | Beginner Yoga, Couples Retreat, Couples Yoga, Romantic Date Ideas, Spirituality
Guest Post by Ashley Josephine Herzberger
If practicing yoga for its calm-inducing, stress-reduction, weight loss, flexibility-increasing and/or fitness maintenance benefits doesn’t strike your fancy, fret not – you don’t have to practice yoga for any of those reasons. If, however, you want to be a better lover, you may want to reconsider.
Inherent in the magic spell of yoga is its ability to calm you down, connect you to yourself, the present moment and those around you, and help you feel less reactive, aggressive and more open, loving and appreciative. Being a better lover involves shifting from a space of reactive defensiveness to receptive openness.
5 Ways Yoga Makes You A Better Lover
How yoga makes you a better lover
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Relaxation
To be a good lover, we must move away from our fast-paced, high-stress state when we come home to our partner and families. Staying in a stressful state is dangerous as it leads to chronic stress, which can manifest as physical, mental and emotional pain down the road. You’ve probably known someone who’s had a breakdown, a hospital scare or an illness brought on and amplified by stress.
Yoga helps you relieve stress, as it focuses not only on physical poses that stretch and strengthen the body but also because it focuses on breathing, which counters cortisol (the stress chemical) released in the body. Anything you can do to release your stress will help you be more available to love your partner and enjoy his or her company.
Plus, to have good sex, you must know how to relax. It’s a physiological fact.
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Giving AND Receiving
Yoga also teaches you how to give and receive. Practicing yoga can be very challenging, but also extremely rewarding. Understanding the balance between pushing yourself to your limits and easing off to receive the benefits of relaxation during a yoga class is similar to the play between giving and receiving between partners.
Couples yoga is especially beneficial, as most poses require each partner to communicate and work together before either partner can experience the true benefits of the pose. While understanding balance for yourself is a big win, learning how to understand it between you and your partner is a relationship saver.
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Strength
It’s hard to argue that yoga does not make you strong. Many a muscly man walks into a yoga class skeptical about such “sissy” workouts, only to leave drenched in his own sweat, appalled at how hard yoga actually can be and somewhat ashamed that his big muscles couldn’t power him through the same poses petite ladies all around him naturally and effortlessly complete.
Besides the physical strength and tone yoga can provide to the body (and the eyes of your partners), the emotional and mental strength yoga builds must not be neglected. Emotionally, yoga makes you less reactive and more receptive, less assuming and more questioning, less freaking out and more calm and in control.
Oh, and women, it also helps you tone up your pelvic floor muscles, which happens to be one component of experiencing better orgasm.
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Connection
Practicing yoga by yourself also strengthens your connection to your Self and your spirit. There is nothing religious about yoga in and of itself, but you can certainly feel more connected to God, Buddha, Allah, Jesus, Mohammed, Abraham, whoever.
Practicing yoga with your partner naturally makes you feel more connected to your partner. Besides the fact that you get a full session of yoga touching each other for the majority of the time, you get to experience gentle, relaxing and compassionate touch. For some couples, this is a rarity.
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Focus & Self-control
Finally, yoga helps you increase your focus and self-control. What does this have to do with making you a better lover? Increasing your focus helps you perform better at work but also helps you pay more attention to your significant other. It helps you put down the phone and get rid of distractions so that you can better connect with your partner.
Increasing self-control comes from the mental and emotional benefits of yoga, but also a particular muscular engagement called mula bandha. Similar to a Kegel exercise, engaging mula bandha holds your energy in, rather than allowing it to flow out, if you get my gist men. Over time, this increased focus and self-control can account for longer and more enjoyable sack sessions.
Whether you’re looking to feel more connected to your partner, be a better person for yourself and others, increase strength and flexibility, decrease stress and anxiety or just have better sex, yoga can definitely help you out on all fronts.
For more information and research about how yoga makes you a better lover, check out these articles from Psychology Today, Harvard Health Publications, and Men’s Health.
Guest Post by Ashley Josephine Herzberger
Ashley Josephine Herzberger helps busy women relax. She integrates yoga, meditation, energy practices and self-care exercises to empower women to redefine and rediscover balance in their work and lives. She recently published her first ebook, available for free download on her website, “The Unconventional Beginner’s Guide to Yoga.” Check out her online yoga community for women at AshleyJosephine.com.
by Jasmine | May 11, 2013 | Gift Baskets, Romantic Date Ideas
I was thinking about buying a gift for a girlfriend for her birthday then I considered the social, ecological and environmental effect that my option would make. I might just buy it with FTD, which is a flower delivery services that work with delivering flowers to all the florists in the nation that belong to the FTD system.
Buying Organic Flowers
Purchasing organic produce such as fruits and vegetables has been gaining more significance and you learn through stars who always try to eat gluten-free or organic so what is the effect of buying organic flowers when thinking of gifts for a girlfriend?
Buying Organic Mean Choosing Health For Yourself
When you buy presents for a girlfriend and if you are thinking of buying organic you are having an influence on so many levels. The first level is on your own wellness. There are all kinds of scientifically shown research on the diseases and illness that buying vegetables and fruits sprayed with pesticides can have on your stressed, endocrine, hormonal, cardiovascular and respiratory
Anniversary Presents That Affects The Environment
systems. They have actually been proven to bring about higher levels of all kinds of illness but the most remarkable one is cancer.
Buying Organic Means Choosing Health For Workers
Since it has actually become the mainstream farming practice for industrial farms to spray their production with chemicals, there has been a doubling of cases of cancer and various other sickness and illness. It not just is unhealthy for the person who is eating the fruit or veggie but also for the workers who select and grow the production and who have much greater exposure levels. Normally, the employees are undocmented migrants which means they don’t get any health perks and have no choice if they get sick or hurt on their task. The lot of cases of illness, illness and even death from these workers is hugely unknown due to the reduced reporting of these cases.
Saving the Environment
When you purchase sprayed flowers for gifts for a girlfriend from a grower is the damage it does to the dirt and water, the various other element to think about is that. Pesticides often remain in the dirt for a minimum of fifty years and they can seep into the groundwater also. When the water is affected this can also impact the livestock such as cows or pigs that are often on close-by farms. When you eat beef or pork that has been tainted from pesticides in the water then you end up eating more unsafe chemicals.
There also is an influence on healthy bugs such as ladybugs, honeybees and butterflies which have a massive positive influence on the entire environment. Without the pollination of honeybees, there would be less almonds, fruit and flowers. There is currently an upsurge of honeybees disappearing which is having a really unfavorable affect for all the flower and almond growers in numerous regions in America.
Buying Organic Means Fair Trade
When you purchase flowers as a gift for a girlfriend then there is a worldwide financial trade policy that you are impacting with your acquisition, frequently. Typically, sprayed flowers and produce mean that the industrial ranch is simply considering producing in the cheapest possible method with the least regard for their worker’s wellness or income. When you buy organic that commonly translates to fair trade policy for little farmers.
Finals Thoughts
When you are thinking of buying your following present of flowers for your girlfriend for a birthday or anniversary, think about the health, social, environmental, eco-friendly and international effect that your pocketbook has on all of these things.
When you buy presents for a girlfriend and if you are thinking of buying organic you are having an impact on many levels. There are all kinds of scientifically shown research on the diseases and illness that purchasing fruits and vegetables sprayed with pesticides can have on your nervous, endocrine, hormonal, cardiovascular and respiratory systems.
For more information on a romantic gift for girlfriend, click here.
by Jasmine | May 3, 2013 | Gift Baskets, Romantic Date Ideas
Who are they?
Organic Bouquet is a mission-based business that cares about environmental, economic and social sustainability that strives to have a positive affect on the world. With a goal to make a positive impact on the world and to inspire customers to make responsible choices, Organic Bouquet wants to influence corporations of all sizes to make an easy step to becoming more eco-friendly and socially responsible.
Organic Bouquet flowers are sustainably raised and have actually been accredited by third-party firms, such as USDA, Fair Trade or Rainforest Alliance. Their product packaging is gentle on the earth, safeguards ecology, and is made with sustainable and naturally degradable products.
Organic Bouquet – What You Need To Know.
Organic Bouquet is included in several neighborhood tasks around the globe and holds over 48 partnerships with charitable organizations. Organic Bouquet has the chance to make a distinction while boosting their value for sustainability and expanding to new heights financially and ecologically.
In 2009, Organic Bouquet included an outreach program intended at helping the planters in the Andean Highlands of Ecuador finance the investment of flower seeds. Organic Bouquet funded 100 % of the seeds empowering these farmers to grow an exportable crop and make a reasonable livable return, all while preserving the regional ecological community.
Organic Bouquet Review – What’s Good About Them
Organic Bouquet wants to influence corporations of all sizes to make a basic action to becoming more eco-friendly and socially accountable. The Corporations For Good program provides a low and easy cost platform for doing just that. An employer can declare Organic Bouquet as their official eco-friendly floral source for business presents.
With this collaboration, the company will get a unique reduced rate and each time an investment is made online at www.organicbouquet.com through the corporations account, a percentage of the profits will be donated to a charity chosen by the business.
Offered by Organic Bouquet— which provides earth-friendly flowers and presents– when you buy these roses, you’re not just eliminating hazardous chemicals from our environment, you’re likewise helping farm workers in developing countries support their households. Each investment helps provide education, healthcare and tasks with livable earnings for raisers and craftsmen. In addition, certified sustainable ranches use over 60 % female workers-providing task chances where there as soon as was none.
OrganicBouquet.com selections make a favorable impact even when they’re in transportation; a contribution is made to a fund that’s recovering forests in Central America to offset the carbon released during transport. That commitment extends right down to the packaging– printed with soy- and water-based ink on recycled or recyclable materials. Being socially accountable has never ever been easier, more affordable or more stunning.
With a mission to make a favorable effect on the world and to influence consumers to make responsible choices, Organic Bouquet is reaching out to stars for assistance. A celebrity lends their name to a selection of licensed sustainable flowers and every time those flowers are bought online at www.organicbouquet.com, a percentage of the profits will be contributed to the charity picked by the celebrity.
Organic Bouquet – What I Didn’t Like
Organic Bouquet doesn’t have the cheapest flowers on the market, so if price and not being ecologically, globally and socially responsible is your top priority then you are better off using another company such as FTD or just a local flower shop that may or may not have a commitment to pesticide free products and sustainability.
Organic Bouquet – Final Thoughts
With every buy from OrganicBouquet.com, you are enhancing the life of a small flower farmer or professional and safeguarding the environment for generations to come.
To find out more about buying flowers from Organic Bouquet, click here.
by Jasmine | Nov 19, 2012 | Family Counseling, Romantic Date Ideas
Keeping the Passion and Intimacy in Marriage.
Keeping the Passion and Intimacy Alive in Marriage
I was reading this article in Prevention Magazine about 10 ways to stay connected and wanted to also write my own version of this and add comments of things we do to keep things saucy.
- Doing these outside of your normal routine. I think Michael and I like to always mix it up with a new event. One weekend might be a Jazz Festival, the next one might be a tour of wineries and then he might drag me to a cheese tasting (even though dairy hates me). Our couples yoga we do every Friday night in Philadelphia ( Manayunk) is a way for us to offer an adventurous date night to couples we ever met. Our first unofficial date was watching fireflies on a hammock on a warm summer night outside of New York city in Rheinbeck, NY. Our next more official date after we had lunch in the East Village and then I took him to an acrobatic yoga class in Central Park. In the acro class we were hanging upside like fruit bats and our partners were twirling our bodies in the air like a Cirque Du Soleil pro. One of our more memorable dates was when he took me to Longwood Gardens and we saw an ice skating show ( in the dead of winter…. at night)….It made for a memorable night!
- Laugh over inside jokes. I think the two of us have loads of these. When I talk about the time before I was with my hubby I refer to it as B.M. ( Before Michael) which we both have a groaning laugh over. We have funny nicknames for each other, some of which I’m not allowed to say in public. It validates our bond to build up a reservoir of laughter and giggles and builds intimacy.
- How was your day? Isn’t it nice to have someone to regale your tale of woe or jubilation every day? It kind of keeps it alive again. Having this chat every day helps to keep you connected to the details, stresses, hopes, intimacy and dreams of your sweetie. Even if it feels like a cliche question the answer is almost always different. I sort of store of all these little stories to tell Michael and when the events are happening I am thinking in my head…. I can’t wait to tell Michael.
1000 Questions for Couples Before You Say “I Do”
- Accept that conflict is a part of any relationship. You are going to agree. You are going to disagree. Your partner will eventually piss you off, frustrate you and disappoint you. What kind of conflict resolution skills do you have? Yelling? Screaming? Whacking them upside the head with a frying pan? Name calling? Sarcasm? If yes, then you or both of you need to gain or develop conflict resolution skills.
- Listening intently to what your partner is saying even if it makes your skin crawl is a learned skill. It might even take going to a therapist to gain and practice these skills. Going to a therapist can cost a few bucks depending on if they take insurance or not. How much do you think a divorce would cost you though? Add up paying for two households, alimony , child support and just the cost of moving and couples therapy can seem like a bargain… not to mention all the heartbreak and devastation that will come with it.
- Fight Fair. When you fight do you just list all the grievances of your partner? Do you get nasty ? After your fight do you feel like you have grown and evolved from it or do you just feel bruised? Couples that use “we” and “us” language fare better in fights. Examine the language you are using.
Saving Your Marriage by Keeping Passion Alive
- Couples that sweat together, stay together. How often do you and your sweetie go for walks, hikes, biking or swimming? You can both keep each other motivated, support each other and do something that will keep each other vibrant. Studies show that women who have a regular exercise practice are more open to intimacy as well. How’s that for motivating you to get off the couch and on the treadmill?
Some recommendations for couples.
1000 Questions for Couples Before You Say “I Do”
Have you been married or in a long-term relationship?
How do you keep intimacy alive?
What are your tips for keeping your intimacy spicy and sweet?
Share your thoughts in our comments.
by Jasmine | Apr 4, 2012 | Couples Retreat, Couples Yoga, Date Night, Romantic Date Ideas, Spirituality, Yoga DVDs, & Podcasts
Partner Yoga For Couples at a Retreat Center near Philadelphia in West Chester
The past few Valentine’s day weekend, we decided to host a partner yoga for couples workshop at a retreat center near Philadelphia in West Chester called Temenos, which is about 40 minutes outside of the city. We were looking for a retreat space that was small, intimate and cozy since we didn’t want it to be a huge group. Partner yoga for couples is a very bonding and buoyant practice and it works well whether you are very athletic and a seasoned yoga practitioner or if you are out of shape or limited with injuries.
I am always pleasantly surprised by who shows up for our classes. When we first started to have our events, I thought it would be hippie, crunchy people that were really into the yoga lifestyle that would show up. I thought it would be people that attended yoga classes on a regular basis or people that had a regular spiritual practice such as Qigong or meditation. Instead, I find people that are more often than not without a regular practice and want to explore their spirituality and connect with their significant other as well.
We aim to present our classes and workshops as welcoming to yoga newbies ( or yoga virgins as we call them) and encourage beginners and the stiff and inflexible to come to our events. Some people, especially the guys, are a little intimidated and scared of yoga. They worry that they are going to end up wearing a loincloth or having to attempt to contort their bodies into ridiculous position a la Cirque Du Soleil.
We have had quite an array or people come into the class. We have had military guys, IT guys, a professional football player, construction guys, doctors, nurses and a few yoga teachers as well.
Instead, we start off each class with a grounding and centering exercise where we establish some communications guidelines and go over boundaries and pushing into other past our limits of comfort and flexibility. Then the next part of the retreat, we start to do some simple movements while seated on the floor. It’s usually a simple movement such as raising your arms together in devotion and then your hands our coming back in tandem together. I like to start off with a very simple pose so that it puts everyone at ease.
Often the next move after this is something that will make people laugh and giggle such as bicycle so that people can start warming up their bodies. We encourage people to be playful and creative with this movement and since their toes our interlocking at this point we encourage people to “make-out with their toes” so that people can start to feel more romantic towards each other.
We then usually go into more challenging poses which are some standing poses. Depending on how athletic the group is, we might do a more challenging pose which requires more core strength and flexibility. The couples are often a bit anxious on some of the balancing poses, especially those that are weight bearing and you are trusting your partner to hold all of your weight and not let you fall on the floor. This part of the class produces some adrenaline and confidence. Having a bit of danger and adventure for a couples help to heighten sexual arousal so we always include a bit of this.
Couples Yoga Moves for Beginners or Seasoned Yogis
Then we have a transitional restorative pose to help calm everyone and have them drop down into a more tranquil space. After the restorative pose, we go into the massage part of the class. The massage part of the class is more about intention and we don’t emphasize technique or skill so much.
After the massage part we have a nice juicy-spooning and cuddling shavasana and then we close the class and everyone usually is completely blissed out at this point. We send our students off and encourage them to have wine, herbal tea, soft music and candles so they can start in this peaceful state. Some people say it is like a tantra workshop but we don’t use that word to describe it since it has such a negative connotation these days and don’t want people to get the wrong idea.
Here are my reviews: Couple Yoga DVDs and Book Reviews – Buoyant Bonding Tips at Home
by Jasmine | Apr 2, 2012 | Date Night, eBooks, Family Counseling, Reviews, Romantic Date Ideas
1000 Questions Married Couples Should Ask before “I do”
What if you had asked your husband or wife 1000 questions before you got married? What kinds of premarital counseling or classes for couples did you take if any?
Although I have a lot of issues with the Catholic Church stances on many issues, one modern practice that is to be commended is their practice of classes for couples before getting married. How much do couples really dive in deep and ask uncomfortable questions about how they will live their lives together. Do couples ask each other things like what temperature would you ideally want the house to be set at in winter and summer? Another resource I love is 1000 questions before Marriage, which is a book that lists all kinds of questions like the ones below. It also gives guidelines on when to ask the questions.
Other men and women have been shocked to learn what their mate thought about sex, religion, careers, household work, money and the future. In fact, many of these differences have led couples to divorce court. Married couples could cut down on a lot of their clashes if they knew more about their mate’s thoughts, beliefs and emotions. The best way to get to really know someone is with questions.
You need to use a certain amount of wisdom with these 1,000 questions. Someone who has just begun dating shouldn’t accelerate the relationship by starting off with questions on marriage and sex.
Obviously, you wouldn’t ask this to someone unless you are in a committed relationship or close to having one but at what point is it appropriate to start to bring these issues up? How can you really know someone’s life values, beliefs without really having deep conversations about them or having to experience them directly when you are thrust in the situation?
1000 Questions for Couples Before You Say “I Do”
How often do you think we should take a vacation? Would we take it just the two of us or would we leave the kids with grandparents or baby-sitters so we can just focus on the two of us? Once we have kids, how often will we plan on having a date night with no kids?
What about the sensitive subject of in-laws? How close or far away or close will we live from our families? How involved do we want them to be in events like weddings, christianings, how we raise our kids, baby-sitting our kids? Do we need them to call before they come over ( if they live close by) or is it ok if they just knock on the door? What kind of boundaries do we want with our extended families? If we live far away, how often will we travel out to see them? How often do we want them to come over and visit us? Will they stay with us or at a hotel?
What about religion? Will one of us convert? Who will that be and how will that be decided? If the other does not convert, how do celebrate religious holidays? If the holidays falls around the same time such as Easter and passover or hanukkah and Christmas, how do we celebrate them? For our kids, how do we teach them about both of our faiths? Are we going to send our children to religious school? What priority do religious holidays have in our lives?
What about money? Will we share bank accounts or maintain separate ones? Do we also have a joint account? If there is a primary breadwinner does that person have more power and control over the household finances or do we share that equally? Do we set a monthly budget? How much savings will we have every month? If one of us has a lot of debt do we pay that off jointly or individually? How do we decide how to spend our money each month? Should we run major purchases by each other first? How do we decide what a major purchase is?
What about where to live? Do we want to live in a house, condo or apartment? Do we want to live in a more urban area, more suburban area or out in the countrywide? Do we want to live part of the time in one city and have a vacation home in another city or country? Will we do our own yard-work or hire someone to do gardening? How important is it to us that our house is in top condition? Do we want to spend money on major repairs so that our house is always in top condition or is that less of a priority? Will we do some repairs ourselves like painting and refinishing or will we hire someone to help us with that?
What about your social life? Do we like to go out a lot to to restaurants, bars, dancing, movies and other cultural events or are we going to focus on savings and business matters and sacrifice going out as much? How late do we like to stay out? Do we like to go out just the two of us or do we prefer to go out with friends and family? How often do we want to socialize with close friends and family?
What about health and wellness matters? Are we going to spend more time and money on eating healthy and staying fit or are we going to relax in our off time and get prepared food and take-out? Who is going to do the cooking and how will we decide that? What kinds of foods do we want to eat on a regular basis? Does one of us have any dietary restrictions and how accommodating will our mate be to them?
1000 Questions Before You Get Married
What about pets? Do we have any allergies to pet? If yes, then are you prepared to give up an animal or not have a certain kind of animal for your partner? If we adopt a pet, what kind of pet will we adopt? How do we figure out how to share in taking care of it? How much of a priority will out pet be? Do we plan our day, vacations around our pet or take them with us? If our pet starts to get sick will we invest a lot of money in taking care of it? Will out pet sleep in our bed with us? Are they allowed up on the furniture?
I believe a lot less couples would get divorced (or even not marry each other in the first place) if they actually knew each other well enough before they got married.
What are your thoughts on pre-marital counseling? What do you wish you had asked before you had gotten married? Post your thoughts on our Facebook page.
Jasmine Kaloudis teaches many marriage retreats near Philadelphia as well as romantic poses for couples and is the author of the best spiritual websites list.
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